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Newsflash: Racial Stereotype League Saves The World Again!!!

May 3rd 2008 22:25
In a breaking news story, the Racial Stereotype League has saved the world yet again today. Yes! The team who continues to prove that racial stereotypes can positively work to improve our world has finished their fifth daring adventure and rescued the world from certain doom.

It was a bleak and early Monday when the world awoke to the disturbing and terrifying news that a Rebel Faction of Russian / Middle-Eastern Soviet Terrorists had obtained a Biological Nuclear Bomb capable of destroying our entire internet MySpace.

People broke down in tears, crying and hold each other. Sobbing in the streets and repenting to the church of scientology. Yet their pleas fell on deaf ears. Truly, the end was near.


Suddenly the mysterious and sassy leader of the Racial Stereotype League, "Mr.Whiteman", whipped his troops into action. He called forth his team of incredible super-men and women and using a Solar Powered Jet-Plane set a course for Russia / The Middle East.

Using his powers of Exploitation, Mr.Whiteman deducted a clever plan to get the Bomb back in American hands, sell it, and build an American themed amusement park in the middle of Baghdad, all in one clever swoop.

Mr.Whiteman Stock Photo


As the team arrived at the Soviet / Terrorist compound they found themselves to be initially thwarted by a crafty Barbed-Wire Fence!!

"Oh No!" cried Mr.Whiteman.

"How will we ever surpass a vaguely unguarded fence!? This has certainly been our undoing!" asserted the rest of the team!


"FEAR NOT! For my people have mastered this skill and I am an example of their prowess." came a voice from the back of the league.

Suddenly "The Jumping-Beaner" stepped forward. A native of South America and world-class fence jumper, his ability to leap over even the highest fence was more than legend... it was myth... and legend...a legendary myth.

Using his incredible talents he quickly leapt over the border of the Soviet / Terrorist compound and dug a hole under the fence for his entire team to use.



Once they were inside the compound - Mr.Whiteman called forth one of his most trusted home-boyz. "Blacker Man" long distant and interracial cousin of "Spider Man". Blacker Man was an expert in fields such as stealing, running and shooting. His task - should he be paid to accept it - was to steal the bomb from the enemy stronghold and then run like hell.

Naturally he took to it like a White person looting a shopping mall....



Within moments Blacker Man had stolen the bomb and a bunch of other valuable things that were completely unjustified. But oh well! They were off - back under the fence and to their jet they set a course for the United States where they intended to sell the bomb!

Mr.Whiteman's knowledge of the economy and money were not his fine points so he tossed the bomb off to his accountant and financial advisor "Lord Jewstein".

"Lord Jewstein" had a deep and passionate love for collecting, investing and stockpiling all things that looked, felt and smelt like money. He quickly assessed their bomb situation and within no more than 24 hours on Ebay a group of Soviet / Terrorists in Russia / The Middle East had purchased the Bomb!! They were all filthy-stinking rich!!



With their money in hand - it was finally time to initiate the final part of their plan! Mr.Whiteman was not a good architect and his math scores were pitiful. So he employed his analytic mastermind, she was not only incredible at math but she could engineer things that would boggle the western mind. He summoned to his side: "Asian Chick" and with his bountiful supply of recently Jewified money, he employed her to build his amusement park in Baghdad.



The entire project took only 48 hours and finally their work was done. They had accomplished the American dream and at the same time saved the internet, the world and the economy all at once!! God bless the Racial Stereotype League!



BREAKING NEWS: A Rebel Faction of Soviet / Terrorists from Russian / The Middle East have purchaseda Nuclear Biological Bomb off Ebay.... The world is about to end.....




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Comments
2 Comments. [ Add A Comment ]

Comment by RubySoho

May 4th 2008 02:35
I hope its a Magic Mountain, so much better than Disney Land. I'd go to Baghdad for that.

Comment by Anonymous

May 4th 2008 04:26
Is that a Mexican Frank Zappa???

Hmmmmmmmmm

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